Abandoned as an infant, she brings up orphaned girls

Every girl is precious. Educate the girl and strengthen the nation.

That was the motto with which the Indian government started the Beti Bachao Beti Padhao (save the girl child, educate the girl child) programme in 2014.  

But two decades earlier, Punjab-based Parkash Kaur had taken it upon herself to do just that – save and educate abandoned and orphaned girls. 

She had grown up in an orphanage herself after she was abandoned as a baby girl some 60 years ago in a secluded corner in Jalandhar, Punjab. 

But the way she rose above her plight to run Unique Home, the Jalandhar-based home for baby girls, led to national recognition with the government awarding her a Padma Shri, given in recognition of distinguished service in any field. 

Punjab’s preference for boys

The award holds special significance as Punjab has one of India’s most skewed sex ratios. With a preference for boys, female infanticide was prevalent in Punjab until a decade ago. 

There has been a lot of improvement over the years. In Punjab, the sex ratio was 860 (females to 1,000 males) of children at birth in 2015-16, as per the National Family Health Survey data. This has increased to 904 in 2019-21, even though it is well below the national average of 929.

“Besides financial and marital issues, the main reasons are the difficulties in ensuring their safety from exploitation in society and the dowry menace for marriage,” said Parkash Kaur, as the reasons for families not wanting girls.

Despite changes in people’s perceptions, girl babies continue to be abandoned. And Kaur gives them a home.

Kaur is “mama” to all the girls

Kaur grew up in an orphanage in Jalandhar run by the Nari Niketan Trust, which was set up by Avtar Narain Gujral and Pushpa Gujral – freedom fighters and parents of former Prime Minister I K Gujral. It provided a safe home for abandoned and widowed women following partition.

Growing up in Nari Niketan, Kaur developed an inclination for service. Her life took a turn when she found an abandoned girl and brought her home. 

Bringing up that baby triggered a desire in her to give abandoned baby girls a home. And so, with the  help of the Bhai Ghanayya Charitable Trust and a few social workers, Unique Home was born. 

The girls in Unique Home call Kaur “ma” or “mama.” She has been the mother to over 100 girls since she started the home in the early ‘90s.

Education is key 

From the beginning Kaur decided that she would educate the girls. She always enrolls them in convents or private schools and even professional colleges.

“We know that the education standards in private schools are far better than in government schools,” she reasoned.

She takes all efforts to make sure that the girls do not feel any different from the other students.

Volunteers who have worked with her also said that she takes very good care of each child.

“Being an orphan myself, I know the pain that such babies go through and what their needs are,” Kaur said. 

“She remains busy day in and day out for the kids’ well-being,” said Anju Agnihotri, a senior journalist based at Jalandhar. “From dressing them to looking after their studies, she’s involved in all their activities.”

She often takes them to different tourist spots, including hill stations and shopping malls, to make sure that the girls do not miss out on life.

“I just want to give them the best care and education to ensure such abandoned girls lead a meaningful life in society,”

A unique tradition at Unique Home

Kaur has instilled a special naming tradition at the orphanage, which ensures a cycle of care and love.

“The older girls choose the names of the baby girls brought here – Hindu, Muslim, Christian or Sikh,” she said with an indulgent smile. “And I love them doing so.”

Another interesting and unique tradition at Unique Home is that all the girls celebrate their “birthday” on April 24.

“It’s in honour of an elderly person Ram Garib Das. He had lost his legs in an accident, but he would still come and work every day,” recalled Kaur. “He would even donate his earnings to us. We celebrate all our girls’ birthday on April 24 since it was his birthday. That’s how we honour him.” 

The work and the recognition

Most of the baby girls were only a few days old when they came to Kaur.

“Thirty girls are married and well-settled. Many of them have good jobs,” said Kaur with pride.

Kaur’s dedication in bringing up the girls is known even among the Punjabi diaspora around the world. The Canadian Minister Harjit S Sajjan and business tycoon Nita Ambani have visited the home. 

Contributions from the diaspora have helped in running the home, which presently houses 70 girls. Three years ago, the home moved from Jalandhar to a bigger complex in the outskirts of the city.

Her friends and well-wishers are highly appreciative of her work and acknowledge that she deserves the Padma Shri.

“Her services are really appreciable as raising abandoned children, especially girls, is really very difficult,” said Gurjot Kaur, a trustee of Nari Niketan. “To her they are family.”

The unassuming Kaur said that the award inspires her to do more service to society.

“I only wish that no parent ever abandons their daughter or leaves her to die in garbage heaps,” she rued.  

If anyone is unable to raise a girl child because of any problem, Kaur promises that Unique Home would raise her well. 

Initially Kaur was not keen on her wards being adopted, since she considered each child as her daughter. But now adoptions are made with the guidance of government agencies.

“I request people with folded hands, “Please don’t throw the baby away to be killed by dogs.”

Rajesh Moudgil is a journalist based at Chandigarh.

NOTE: In case of dire circumstances, Kaur requests people to call her or Unique Home at 88472 90229 / 98721 20664